So, while all you nut jobs were up at 3AM to be at Penney's for the insane 4AM opening, I was snoozing blissfully in my bed. Then, after you wrestled that little old lady from Murtaugh to the ground for those mother-of-pearl earrings for your grandmother, and as you made your way groggily to Best Buy for their 5AM opening, I turned the pillow over for that delicious coolness and went back to sleep.
When you were elbowing some 300 lb dude who slept in the parking lot to get his PS3 with 3 games and a Blu-Ray movie and some crazy soccer mom was blocking the Wii aisle so her husband could load ALL the Wiis from the entire store into their basket, I heard one of the kids stirring, but since they were quiet in using the toidy, I was able to lay back down and slumber some more.
As you swerved through two intersections to avoid people talking to each other on their cell phones coordinating the Fred Meyer attack for socks, and as you inched your way forward in the longest line in Target history to buy those scooters, I was thinking about getting up-- but deciding "no, I think I'll 'snooze it' for a few more minutes.... or an hour."
I'm up now, but I'm still in my PJs. I just peeled an orange for Cole, shared it with Cate and Cam, made myself a turkey sandwich (on one of those still-soft rolls), and browsed online to find that Wii game on sale on Amazon for less than Wal-Mart's "doorbuster" price.
Didya have a good morning? ;-)
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2 comments:
What a great piece! You are soooooooooooooooooo funny and smart! Especially smart to stay home. I was in NJ for Black Friday, and the only place I went was to the bakery to get a crumb cake. Yum!
Hee, hee.
You know, btw, that I'm really skewering myself. Until this year, I've been a pretty regular Black Friday guy (though sometimes unwillingly). Last year was the scooter year. '06 was for GameBoys (I think). Bleh.
I just couldn't make myself do it this year. Maybe it's the fact that I got my 46" LCD TV already. No need to stampede for one.
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